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stories biography escapes archives


the.girl


Im the classic virgoian who believes in perfection. Sometimes people dislike me because they find me acting too cold towards humans. Or maybe they just can't accept my high standards. So, love me or not, u decide.

Screams
Friday, June 02, 2006
yawnz..so tired now..gonna turn in quite soon.these few days i felt really tired.wonder whether it is because of those tests and projects that are causing me to feel this way.fatigue seems to get me.is it that im lacking vitamin b in my diet?for quite a few nights ive slept for about 11-13 hrs but nevertheless,its still not enough for me.no matter how long ive slept,i still want more.thats why i always say that i wish to sleep forever.maybe now is not the right time yet.i will definitely have this opportunity when i die because i can sleep for as long as i want,with no grumbles and complaints whatsoever.now i shall just move on with the passing days and months and years while the clock is ticking its every second,every minute and every hour.just bear through it though time indeed passes quite slowly at this moment in time for me.
as i reflect what i did for today,i confessed for being a naughty girl.i pon IDEAS for a reason.miss phoon's lesson ended at 3pm,then i quickly rushed down to crescent in a cabbie.if the security guard there could have bits and pieces of memory of me,he would be scratching his head wondering why this ex-crescentian kept coming back.does she love the school so much that even though she has graduated,she will come back now and then.actually i went back today purely because to attend the booster session.the main purpose was to catch a glimpse of monkie.i reached at 3.15pm or so and the booster ended at 4pm.45 minutes of looking at monkie is definitely not enough but i must feel contented and grateful that i did get to see him today.i hid in the control room with the help of suat hoon.she "smuggled" me in.looking through the black tinted glass window,i could only secretly look at monkie.watching him train is one great joy in my life.i did not want to let him see me because i fear that i will give him the impression that im crazy.a lunatic fella.liking someone means that even if i can only see him for a while,it will bring joy to my heart.though the time today was short,i treasure it alot.as for playing truant for my lesson,i did not regret it.i will only regret if i miss the chance today.'cause i miss him dearly so.by the way mr mok's lesson is just another laughing session.in that case i'd rather see monkie and listen to his jokes.its killing two birds with a stone!well done.i really wish to open that window when i was in the control room.really tempted to see him directly in the light and not in darkness.oh ya..suat hoon told me that monkie mentioned about me to my juniors when i had not reached yet.he said that theres one girl from crescent who scored 7 points but chose to go to poly.he also said that well its my choice and hope.HAHA..so happy!he remembered me.remember that i exist in this world.so this is something that is worth to be happy about for today.at least monkie understood me and did not even ask me why i didnt choose to go to jc instead unlike what others did,who kept throwing shit stuff at me and made my mind wavers.
[to monkie:thanks.you did not pressurise me and instead, you knew my goal.=)i promise you that i will give my 100% in my studies and persevere to the end.although now im not exactly doing quite well in my studies,i promise you that i will buck up and not to disappoint you.i want to let you see a SYLVIA who reaches her goal ultimately and leaves no regret for the choice she made.]
i failed my genopt just as expected,but not too badly.there are 7 failures.so sad.chris ng told me that "sylvia,you must spend more time studying.."yeah..more CHAIRTIME must be spent.how could i miss out those parts about proving questions in my lecture notes?i took them down yet i did not study them well.alright mr chris,i promise you too that i will spend more time in your genopt.weird.i did not exactly feel very sad over my failure.no doubt that im a little disappointed about being the minority who fails as compared to the majority who scored 70% and above,i told myself that ive done my best.(for the parts that i covered during revision).the fact is,to be honest,the best is yet to come.i could have performed better and give a better "best".whats the use of regretting now?????the test is over so all i can do now is to buck up and do well for the next test.i admit that im competitive in nature.well in real life who doesnt?its all about competition for survival in today's world.fortunately,the good things today(about monkie) balanced out the sad things(results).it should attain a neutral mood but im more hyper to the happy stuff nevertheless.HEES.

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