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stories biography escapes archives


the.girl


Im the classic virgoian who believes in perfection. Sometimes people dislike me because they find me acting too cold towards humans. Or maybe they just can't accept my high standards. So, love me or not, u decide.

Screams
Saturday, August 18, 2007
yes..suat hoon.
i'm even smiling right now while typing this.

finally, something made me smile tonight.
even something as simple as sharing his food can make my heart miss a beat.
amazing right? or you might be thinking sylvia's mad.
he wanted bak chor kway teow mee soup.
the person served him fishball kway teow mee soup.
see the difference?
today then i know he detest fishballs.
ahh..in fact anything that's gotta do with fish.
then he asked me to get a bowl.......
and he dumped all the fishballs to me.
funny right?????
it suddenly brought me to those memories whereby i was still in my childhood times and mommy and daddy fed me with something in another bowl..
yes..that kind of feeling.
when i was holding onto the bowl just now, i was smiling and smiling.
just feel happy lah.

share mee goreng, carrotcake etc...............i didn't know that sharing can feel so wonderful,
that's unless the person is him, i guess.

my secret.
i told him last night.
i really had a hard time stuffing those shit in my heart, wanting to find someone to share yet on the other hand was hoping that it stays as a secret.
some things are not meant to tell other people,
but i know that i certainly can share with him.
i admit that when i'm at the heat of the moment, i curse and swear at everything
but i actually calmed down and listened to his reasoning which i think will be quite impossible for me to accept from other people's mouth.
hey, i saw my mistakes and shortcomings.
there's still a big big room for me to improve and to change to a better person.
thanks GOHS.......
"anything call me"


reassurance time and again that gives me a huge support which i know i will not fall into six feet underground.
even if he's not there physically to catch me when i'm falling, his words are.


seriously..that night when i alighted at redhill mrt station, i was feeling damn low.
low until i was kinda attracted to the mrt tracks.
get me?
i had this question which came to my mind suddenly.
how come mrt stations become a hot spot to die nowadays?
isn't it similar to jumping off the building?
close your eyes and jump!!
only difference is that the depth was much smaller, that's all.
i can't imagine if i really jump down the tracks, he must be wondering why i hadn't reached home that night.
and everyone grieves for me.
fortunately, that was just a passing thought.


why do things get so unsuccessful these few days?
how come i just can't seem to get things right?
what's wrong??????????????????????????


however smart he is, he still didn't catch the most obvious.
that's the saddest thing.
i want, yet fearful of his answer.
how?

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