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stories biography escapes archives


the.girl


Im the classic virgoian who believes in perfection. Sometimes people dislike me because they find me acting too cold towards humans. Or maybe they just can't accept my high standards. So, love me or not, u decide.

Screams
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
only some of you know about my current situation.do you actually know that im bursting inside?both imploding and exploding.everything all comes together to create a torturous feeling.stress and loss of my valuable possession.ive gained and lost some things.i lost my precious "baby" and what have i gained?nothing but a earful of scoldings and cold looks by my dad.can you imagine?he is giving me the get-lost look as if its to an enemy.thats true actually.he did tell me to get away from him.i know its my fault and i can understand why he's so angry.his hard-earnt money to buy the "baby" for me is wasted as i had lost it.its normal that he will feel the pinch in his heart.why must that idiot fella take my thing?(to put it in a nicer term)didnt his parents teach him that taking other people's things without permission is wrong?how could he???!!!
im feeling really low and depressed.my mind contains many many things.projects,academic stuff,failing of test,loss of my "baby",my dad..........ARGH.im going crazy!really afraid to sink into depression.im also a victim.how come no one understands that?i have feelings too.damn it.its not about money loss,its about the feeling of losing something.i can feel the heartache man...as for stress,my approach is to take one step at a time.clear one thing by one thing slowly.i began wondering why do i wake up every morning.to complete projects?to study?to play?to explore the world of different human nature?to get hurt and cheated along the way?i have the feeling of suffocation right now,making it so difficult to catch a breathe of fresh air.my head is so 'heavy' now.thinking im getting a fever.my body temperature today is quite high.highest is 37.7....im feeling extremely terrible.oh gosh.
[some people are SMART to seize opportunities.but they use it in the WRONG way.]

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